Let the countdown begin...

Let the countdown begin...

What countdown you ask!
Well there are 2 amazing countdowns to be aware of.

Are you ready for this...

COUNTDOWN #1 - February 16, 2019

This is a monumental date, because on this day, someone I have never met gave me one of life's most precious gifts, most selfless act possible, and went into the history book for being the first Double Lung Transplant on the very first Family Day in Ontario.

If you haven't guessed, although I am sure you have, February 16, 2019 marks the 10 year anniversary of my Double Lung Transplant, that was necessary due to end stage Cystic Fibrosis.  I have my donor family to thank as well as my amazing doctors and nurses.  My surgeon Dr. Du Perron in Toronto, my fantastic Cystic Fibrosis doctor, Dr. Shawn Aaron. I also have to send a shout out to Dr. Ficara, because he was the one that suggested I get assessed for transplant.  Now if i can find him, thank him properly, he has no idea as to the outcome of his persistence.  Hmmm, how to find him!  lol

I will never forget that day, not only did i travel to Ottawa with my bestie Rebecca her man at the time Chris, who is now her hubby. Rebecca was with me in the clinic, when some comments were made by the new Nurse, Ena.  I told them that I wouldn't be admitted to hospital, over my dead body, Ena's comment was... "Well isn't that ironic". 

Rebecca and I looked at each other in astonishment.  I think that was my lowest point, and to have her there made it somewhat more tolerable. We then met up with Rebecca's brother Matt, who is like my little brother, at St. Hubert's on St. Laurent.  We drove up in a red Honda Prelude, me coughing and spitting my germs into an empty PEPSI can.  My beverage of choice. lol

*Please note that Ena, is the best nurse.  She has learned a lot about CF patients, how our minds work, and what we go through in one day, far surpasses anything that any one person would encounter in their lifetime. 

We kick some serious ass.

COUNTDOWN #2 - April 30, 2019

This day, this very amazing and wonderful day, will be celebrated with friends and family, it will coincide with the 10th Anniversary of my Double Lung Transplant, because on this magical day, I turn... wait for it... 

40

Aaaaahhhhhh, I cannot believe that I will be 40 years old.  A birthday I never thought I would see.  After being told by doctors to not expect to make it to 20, let alone 40. This is so awesome.  Every morning the beauty of a deep breath awakens my soul, the bright sun shining into my face reminding me, if the sun can come up every morning, I can sure as hell wake up too.

Everyday... grateful, is not just a word in my vocabulary, it's my meaning, my life, my salvation.

I welcome you all to embrace the days you have with love, gratitude and most importantly a sense of fulfillment, you woke up today, you took a breath today, you put you pants on one leg at a time.  But the most important of these things, is that your family, your friends and your loves will be able to hold you, love you and thank you for being here.  I now I thank you for reading my blog, for advising me on the simple things.  Knowing that I can hopefully help you, and help your loved ones gain insight in CF, transplant and living life in the moment.

We all have a role to play in the successes of others, we also ave a role to play in our failures.  Don't remember them as failures, they are lessons yet to be learned.  Wake up, energized and ready to learn something new about yourself, your friends, your family.  Believe in today!

With loads of love, I thank you!

Kisses

~A

It's that time again...

Hey there friends,

It's that time of year again.  Yep, my Lungaversary. 6 glorious years.

I had a notion to do some research on deaths in Ontario on the 16th of February 2009, or in and around that time.  But I haven't done this as of yet.  I had this whole wonderful event planned on the 16th of February this year, because every day follows on the same day of my transplant 6 years ago.

 If I can get just a few people to indulge me and be a part of something that is so important to me, would be the making of a wonderful event.  But there have been no response to my request that I have made. I wanted people to write a little note, a sentiment, a bible verse, a quote anything to thank them for their selflessness and their strong hearts be be able to donate their loved ones to complete strangers.

Is this too much to ask?

It must be because no one has even given me a simple answer as to why they will or wont.  Not even my best friends are going to participate in this event, and that truly hurts. But if they asked me to do something I am there without a question.  I guess I am asking something too personal, maybe not everyone is for Organ donation, if that's the case, then how are we even friends?  I am breathing and living today because of a family that believed that their loved one will live on a little longer.  I am so confused!

I honestly thought that this was something we all shared, and could be a part of.  But I guess i was surly mistaken on that one.

Why doesn't anyone see how much this means to me?  Am I the only one who is so thankful that i would give up my life for anyone that needed my organs when I die. You know I was hoping that this was going to be a good blog today, but it has just really upset me, that I don't think I can write any more.

So for as long as i am alive, I will cherish the lungs that were so generously donated to me.  I will guard them with my life, protect them at all cost, and do whatever deemed necessary to give these beautiful lungs the live the previously owner, should be living.  Well in order for my life to prevail, I should not rely on anyone but myself to thank God and my donor family for what they have given me.  Because some days, I feel as though I am the only one fighting this battle.

I will celebrate on my own this year.  And should anyone feel it necessary to wish me a good day then that's fine.  but it's not just my day, it's also my other family's day.  The should get the same amount of respect from my friends and family, as they give me.

Good night Blogland

Ali

Rememberance

This blog is dedicated to my donor family, 

and the events that will transpire from now 

until February 2015.

This year I have decided to make a  

Thank you Scrapbook/Memory box.

I had this idea last year but didn't implement the tools to get it done.  So I sent out feelers on Facebook, to see who would participate, and to my chagrin, quite a few people have responded.  I am hoping that I have made it easy for everyone to either send me their letters or to come down for the party we will have for my Donor.  Now tell me if this sounds stupid, but what if I were to have a THANK YOU sign, and get everyone's family to hold it take their picture and include it in their letter.  do you think that would break confidentiality for me, or do you think that if I were to do that then they would see a face, and maybe want to meet up with me.  I don't know if this is a wish that most likely won't come true.

I found this picture that really makes sense to me right now.  What do you think? It's as though the Angel I envision my donor to be, is embedded into the heavens.  I have been all about Angels recently, I know my donor is an angel, but I need to find the perfect image of who I think they are.  So I am going to post a couple and if you guys don't mind let me know which you think is best, I want to find the perfect Angel for the cover of the Thank you Box/Scrapbook.  Here's the next one.

I found a feather the other day in my dining room.  I had bought feathers not long ago but never used them, I had returned them and then suddenly out of nowhere this perfect feather, and I mean perfect, just appeared.  I think I might just look for feathers and not angels.  I will find some images that have a meaning to me when I see it.

On a lighter note, I am also in the market for a pin-up angel.  Wonder if they exist? NOPE, they don't.

So if anyone here, knows me and wishes to thank my donor also, you are more than welcome.  there are some rules though.

1) No names, mine or yours

2) No gender notification, can't tell them I'm a girl

3) Can't tell them where I am from

4) Refer to my Donor family or Donor and such or "They"

5) Do not tell them what organs I received

Send me a message and I will send you the address as to where you can send the letters.

Well, I am off for a little while, have stuff to do.  I'll be back tonight with another blog about... well I don't know yet.

Love you all.

Kisses and Hugs

Ali

Pre Christmas Banter

BLAH... BLAH... BLAH...

Well tis the season where I begin the bringing in of emotions.  Lately I have been feeling a little out of sorts.  Crying at a Heart and Stroke commercial, crying when Montreal's beloved Jean Beliveau passed away.  I am not usually emotional this time of year, but I think someone inside me is trying to get out and say a little something to the world so I am going to let them take the reins and tell me what is bothering them.  If you are wondering who I am referring to, this would be my Donor.

Lately I think that my donor is a little depressed, passing on their sadness to me.  Making the mundane things a little more exuberant in my head.  I feel for my donor, they (I will now refer to they as she) she has been having issues with little things.  The Heart and Stroke foundation commercial would strike a cord as this was how she had passed away, was sudden cardiac arrest. Also known as DCD in the medical world.

The passing of Jean Beliveau, who was loved by so many, means to me that she was also loved by many, many who will not be able to see her smile, hear her laugh or be able to hold her again.  I feel sometimes that a good hug to a loved one makes me feel a little bit better.  It brings a smile to my face, almost as though her heart and her soul are being hugged at the same time.  So when you see me, and hug me, make sure to give it an extra squeeze, I think my donor needs it too.

This is always a time of the year I  am most grateful, as I almost didn't have this to hold on to not long ago. So i can justify the little things that go wrong at this time of the year.  When my heart feels a little off it's rocker, I stop and think about the trials that I have gone through.  Transplant isn't a cure, it's a temporary treatment that is supposed to last a little longer than any ordinary medication cant do.

My life is like a glass ball, it's balanced now, it will be balanced as long as i can keep the tenants in the body happy.  It's not a matter of them making me happy, it's me making them happy.  It's frustrating and ludicrous at some times, but it's definitely worth the fight I do to keep them happy. I have so many things to be grateful for, but most of all, like it is always going to be.  It's about the family I have never met, and perhaps never will.

If there was a way I could meet Theresa Caputo and hear all about my Donor my family that is gone and just to know that when it's time, there will be people waiting for me.  Now that this conversation has gone morbid i am going tos top here and say these few things that will always bring me back to the now.

"Life is given, not taken, it is shared.  Someone somewhere will be there to greet you".

After all, I am the angel at the gates of heaven, who will meet you.

Can't be anything wrong with that right.

End of Day!

Good night

More Happy News

Not even less than 24 hours that our good friend Kim went under the knife to save her life with a liver donor, my DLTx buddy got her new lungs.

CONGRATULATIONS goes out to Alice Ferguson who was waiting for some time to get her lungs has been blessed with a new set of shiny pink lungs.  My theory is that Kim and Alice have the same donor.  In Double Lung Transplant we have to wait until the lungs go through what's called the X-Vivo machine, created by Toronto's very own Dr. Shef Keshavjee, a brilliant man and mind.

This is the Beautiful Alice before transplant

Shannon on the Left is Alice's daughter.
That's Alice on the right.

Unfortunately I don't have one from post transplant like I did for Kim, but I'll find one, and when I do I will put it up. 

GUESS WHAT I FOUND!!!!

Please be advised this is day 1 after surgery
We all look like we just walked into a door.
But isn't she beautiful!!!!!!!

Alice this is one of the best post transplant pics I have ever seen.  You look marvellous, simply marvellous.

I first met Alice at her fundraiser.  We had spoken on Facebook occasionally, but it was her event that brought us close together.  She was beautiful, dashing and none more than the perfect candidate for transplant.  She was positive, upbeat and didn't let anything get in her way.

Alice to me is going to be one of my new besties.  We will have coffee together, or water.  We'll talk about how transplant is changing lives every where.  Imagine if these pink lungs Alice received are from the same donor as Kim.  how cool would that be. Really Cool!!!!

I couldn't' be happier for Alice today.  When I found out she got her new lungs, I was too busy to put the wonderful news on my blog.  Well Alice my darling, here's to you and the new girls.

Our home town of Cornwall did a nice article on Alice, here's the link:

Alice Ferguson Lung Transplant

Special Note:  Alice darling, from on DLTx to the next, it's party time!

Love one another, and sign your organ donation wishes on-line.

Recycleme.org

Thank you all, 

and have a wonderful, 

light inspired day.

Forever

Moi 

My life to live.

Good day my readers

It is my life that brings a smile to my face.  The people I know, the people I meet and the family I absolutely love.

It is this love I have for life that brings the most important aspects of my life together.  Not only does my family and friends hold special places in my heart, but so do the friends I meet on-line or wherever I go.  I met friends in Toronto that I will hold near and dear to my heart, the ones that came to see me after my surgery, and the family that kept me from going insane.  

You know who you are. 

Kevin & Erin McCue, Kevin & Bernadette Proulx, Chris, Jill, Morgan, Grace and Kyra Tessier, Shawna, Lindsay, Erin & Jeff, Judd, My mom and Dad, My In laws, Memere, Jim, Dave, Jim Brownell, Tracey, Rebecca Hardy (on more than one occasion, thanks Chris for training at that time) Cheif Parkinson, Mayor Bob Kilger, Tracey Trottier, Bobby & Noreen Richer, and the two most important men who were there for me at that very moment that everything happened, Chris Watt and the man of my life, Derek.  

Without all these people in my life, I wouldn't be able to say thank you, for being there for me.

Many of you were there in spirit and I thank you dearly for that.  I also have to thank the Pope, as he sent his well wishes to me through the Vatican, hard core, yeah I know.  Thank you to my family, who couldn't be there but I know they're there in spirit and love and respect to the donor family.

Today is my Donor day.  I always think of them, all the time, but sometimes it's hard to realize that I am here with their lungs.  I am still alive, and I can't believe it sometimes.  It's days like this that I just find my heart troubled when I cannot imagine what I have done to be here today.  Why me, why is it I get to live while another dies.  I can't answer those questions, I can only pray that I will be able to meet my donor in heaven when I get there.

So to my donor again today, I live because you died.  I live because you tried, and I live because your family thought it would be the best decision, and something you wanted.  THANK YOU!

And this is my blog for the night.  Until tomorrow I bid you Adieu and pleasant dreams, they are what we are made of.  Loving you all today and always,

Ali

To what do i owe the pleaseure.

I am forever thinking about my donor family. i am always wondering why I haven't heard from them. It's coming up to Thanksgiving, and i have decided to send them a little letter. Not giving out too much information, but enough to let them know how important they are to me, how I consider them a part of my family, they are now in my DNA, literally. I have been blessed on so many levels. My heart can barely contain the emotion i hold deep inside, where no one can see them.

Do people not see the pain in my eyes, that is not knowing where my lungs come from. The unknown of who has helped me stay alive and live for another 50 to 60 years. I know it's hard to feel the pain of losing someone so close to you. I understand that they want to be alone, that they want their privacy, but i want to know more about the person who helped me live and the courageous family who helped make that hard decision to allow me to live, while their loved one has moved on.

We were a perfect match, does that mean, on some level we were destined to meet at some point? How do i know I haven't met them already, and this is all a formality. How do i know whether or not this set of lungs is form a young girl or boy. How will i ever know what this person did for a living. And why me zest for life has increased by billions.

I thank god everyday that i can breath, that despite having grade 1 rejection, I am very optimistic that this is going to pass. This is minor set back, a little bump in the road of life. i am thinking of my friends Marc, who is struggling with the decision to get a transplant, and also thinking of my dear friend Meg, who as we speak is in the hospital getting a tune up. i hate tune ups, but having people who are looking out for your best interests is important.

I have a nurse i like to call my guardian angle. Even though we didn't get along so famously in the beginning, we are now a part of each other. She knows what i fell, what i think. Almost like a part of me, in some sense of the word.

My life is like a river, ever flowing and always rejuvenated.

Making choices on how to live your life, can change your life. what you decide ultimately, makes your life different. If i chose not to have the surgery i wouldn't be here. But should have chosen to wait it out, I could still be waiting for lungs. But God has other plans for me. His choice allowed me to live my life for a lot longer than i could have ever imagined. I am  forever grateful for this choice he has made for me.

Until i have another epiphany, i will sign off, with good thought and love in my heart. Prayers to all my Cf friends who need them right now. And sending love to all those who ready this. You are all my life line, an someday, when this blog get's published, my list of recipients far outweigh the choices i have had to make in my life.

Sending the love
 Ali